Ever since your partner popped the question, you’ve probably started mulling over who to pick to be your bridesmaids. Maybe you’ve even started contemplating who to choose as your maid of honor. Without a second thought, most brides gravitate towards their closest friends. However, these girls have quite the important job, so you can’t just designate anyone!
Here are some important qualities to keep in mind for picking the best bridemaids out of your group of girlfriends:
1. She’s super close to you
One of the first requirements for choosing bridesmaids is whether you have a close relationship with her. After all, during the events leading up to the ceremony and the ceremony itself, you’re going to be super stressed. Your bridesmaids have to be able to deal with you when you’re at your worst, and this know-how comes easiest to those who know you well. This is why sisters are often chosen, as well as girlfriends who have been around for the long haul.
2. She can afford to lend a hand
Part of being a bridesmaid is pitching in for the various events associated with the ceremony, such as the bridal shower and the bachelorette party. These girls often also have to buy their own dresses and gifts for the shower and wedding. If you’re planning a destination wedding, it gets worse, because your bridesmaids may also need to pay for transportation and accommodations in a foreign land. All these add up to a lot of coin!
If one of your girlfriends is going through financial troubles, it may be a considerate move to pass her over or you can discuss with her about whether serving as a bridesmaid is feasible. If her presence at the wedding is integral to you, the two of you can come to an arrangement where you offer to pay for her dress or help out with the bridesmaid expenses somehow.
3. She is well-organized
This one may be more pertinent for the maid of honor, but an important duty is planning all the pre-wedding parties. Putting on an event of any magnitude requires more fortitude than one would expect. Not only do venues need to be booked, but refreshments need to be ordered and activities need to be arranged and implemented. Some brides may feel that having fun-loving bridesmaids is vital, but organizational skills are important if you want to have a good party.
4. She is not a flake
Do you have that friend who’s often a no-show when it comes to plans? Or a friend who will promise to do one thing, and then never follow through? While no one wants flaky wedding guests, flaky bridesmaids are even worse. They’re such a big part of the whole experience that if there’s a member of the wedding party who is not punctual or isn’t true to their word, it really drags down the whole celebration and causes a ton of unnecessary stress for you.
5. She is patient
A critical quality for your bridesmaids to have is patience. Not only do your bridesmaids have to deal with you when you’re in bridezilla mode , but they often field guest questions, such as dress code inquiries and what to expect on the big day. As representatives of the wedding party, your bridesmaids help out during the ceremony and deal with inappropriate or annoying guests, so definitely pick the girlfriends who can show a more diplomatic and patient side.
6. She is ready for everything
Do you have a friend who is always on top of things? This is the kind of friend who can figure her way out of any situation. Since something inevitably goes wrong during such a hyper-planned event, this kind of ride-or-die attitude is a great one for your bridesmaids to have. If you have this personality type among your bridesmaids, she won’t quit on you when things get tough. Her resourcefulness and “little emergency bag of supplies” will help keep the wedding on track, even under the most unforeseen of worst-case scenarios.
7. She is not a diva
One thing that should be pretty clear is that if you’re one of the bridesmaids, the wedding is not about you. However, it takes a unique type of person to be okay with standing by and being a supporting character for someone else’s big day. Sometimes jealousy takes over, or maybe she just can’t put aside her selfishness during a tough moment. Hence, if you have a girlfriend who constantly feels that she should be the center of attention, it might not be a good idea to choose her as one of your bridesmaids.
8. She is a team player
Wedding parties rarely have just one bridesmaid, so any girlfriend you invite to be a bridesmaid needs to be able to play well with others. These girls should work together to make your upcoming nuptials and everything associated with it as perfect as possible. Therefore, if one of them is not good with group dynamics or if there is a long-running feud among the girls, this could easily ruin the experience for everyone. No one wants pettiness to botch up their big day.
9. She is familiar with the family
Due to the nature of a bridesmaid’s duties, she often has to work closely with your family. In that case, it will simplify matters if the girls are already somewhat familiar with them. This relationship usually takes the form of cousins, sisters, or childhood friends serving as bridesmaids, since they have been around the family for so long. If your bridesmaids already know about that crazy aunt or kooky uncle, that means a lot less explaining for you and a happier time for everyone involved.
A final word
While choosing your bridesmaids may not seem like the most important decision you make during your wedding planning, it is something that will set the tone both for the ceremony itself and the events immediately preceding it. Hopefully, this list will help narrow down your choices so that you have the wedding of your dreams with the support of the best bridesmaids you could ask for.